Planning, well, it's been thrown out the window. Instead, I've been reduced to waiting. And the beauty of waiting, the reduction that happens in waiting, is that it opens wide room for God to sweep in, areas of your heart that He's maybe never had access to before. Waiting, while it's hard, it's good.
I've participated in lots of conversations in the past 9 months or so about whether or not associate pastor's should buy houses. I've camped out in both fields. The very nature of an associate pastor is so tenuous, it's easy to say, no never. It's totally brainless to buy a house when your job is basically never secure. And in the world's eyes, I think I agree with that. But I'm not supposed to look through the world's eyes. I'm supposed to view my life with God's eyes, with His vision for my path, and to remember that the steps of a righteous man are ordered by the Lord.
Looking back to June of 2007, the last thing I wanted to do was buy a house. Owning way back in Sioux City, years ago, scared the tar out of me with just the sheer weight of the responsibility of home ownership. And God so covered us in that transition; from Sioux City to Bible College, when I think about His grace, so generous when we were so young and stupid, well, it reminds me yet again, how good God is, and that is grace truly is sufficient for me.
When we came to Baytown, it was our senior pastor encouraged us to buy. He wanted a tangible commitment from us. I guess youth pastors have a bad rap, but now having been youth pastors for 5 years, I've got to say that our less-then-longevity rate cannot be solely blamed on the associate. There are a lot of other factors, many of which have nothing to do with job-performance or satisfaction. (I'm just sayin!) Anyway, we have always loved and valued our senior pastors opinion, and God opened doors left and right for this very house that I am sitting in right now. I don't doubt for a moment that it was His will for us to live right here the past three years.
This house has been a tremendous blessing to us, and hopefully to anyone who has ever stepped through it's doors. We've loved, lived, laughed, ministered more in this house than any other place we've called home. God has done amazing things in this house and I am grateful for it, and saddened that it's season is drawing to a close. But I am thankful and will remember all the blessings; all the photos taken, the work done, installing the crown molding as a couple, all the life groups we've shared here, the time we squeezed 27 teenagers on the trampoline, my surprise 30th birthday, hosting Thanksgiving with the Wells and the Tindols, putting the roof on, just to name a few. I get teared up when I think of the wonderful people we've gotten to share this space with. No, I wouldn't trade the past 3 years in this house for anything.
So, do we buy or do we rent again? I don't think it's that simple. I don't think, at this juncture in my life, that I'd be brave enough to tell God "I'd never" on any issue. He's taught me a lot about that these past 6 weeks or so. I think my official opinion is that Rob and I will seek counsel from the Lord on every decision, and trust that He's not going to lead us somewhere where He doesn't intend to provide for us. And I think that is something that I can take to the bank. :)
4 comments:
Reading this blog post and HAS been so encouraging to me! Our life is very up in the air right now with plenty of things to be excited and terrified about. Thank you for some solid-faith/real-life writing.
AMEN--you can always take God to the bank. =) I do have to giggle when I read the "I never part" and think about the chats we've had about many things...Texas, San Antonio, living apart--funny how the things we never think we can tolerate are exactly the things God shows us He's big enough to bring us through. Certainly never ideal, but always a blessing because we trust Him with the outcome. Love you bunches--and you know you're the only person I would have ever put on a roof with and had a ball. =) K--
That is so awesome! You and Pastor Rob are inspirational to many people. Keep on "faith-packing". Keep on standing on His word. You both are being obedient to what God is speaking to you both. You are an amazing person. I am enjoying getting to know you.
Hannah, I am so glad to encourage you. You are an incredible woman of God and I am supremely blessed to know you, and to be participating in your life again because of Facebook. :) In my almost 31 years, God has never failed me once. The times I thought maybe He was or was going to, looking back, I was wrong and He was right. Hang in there, my beautiful friend!
And Kim, I love that phrase! thank you for being a long-term foundational friendship in my life. You will never know what that has meant to me. I know that I can always count on you to be in my corner, and to slap some sense into me when I need it. :) And I'm still amazed that your hubby got us on the roof, what an experience! We'll always have that, 'do you remember the time we roofed your 7 pitch house?' Thank you for being so faithful, I love you girl!
And Amanda, it's been such a blessing to get to know you through FB. Pastor Rob and I are only doing what God's called us to do, and He's equipping us every step of the journey. We are blessed to serve Him, and so thrilled to be serving CT now. Thanks for your encouragement! See you soonie!!
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